“Excuses are the nails used to build the house of failure” – Unknown
Excuses are rationalizations we make to ourselves about ourselves, other people, events, and circumstances. They are invented reasons we create to defend our behaviours. We subconsciously invent reasons to neglect taking certain actions, or simply as a means of negating responsibility. Excuses are a means of placing blame for an internal problem on an external condition. There are many reasons why people make excuses. In fact, everyone has different reasons for making them. However, when it comes down to it, we only make excuses for one main reason: FEAR.
Fear traps us to never ever venture out of our comfort zone. Fear often develops because of a lack of understanding, information, resources, experience or perspective. If you lack, or you think you lack any of these things, you will naturally lack confidence, and thus, you will fail to take the action necessary to achieve your goals and new year resolutions, year after year. Consequently; you will tend to make excuses about your life, capabilities, and circumstances to unconsciously help boost your self-esteem and avoid the pain of admitting our failure or lack of effort.
When making excuses, all you’re doing is creating the illusion of security. You’re simply masking the pain on non-achievement by taking a painkiller in the form of an excuse. The pain will, unfortunately, or fortunately, still linger until you finally address the root cause of your non-achievement; which is to overcome your fears.
“If you want to do something, you’ll find a way. If you don’t, you’ll find an excuse” -Jim Rohn
Excuses come in many forms and we tend to make them in many circumstances. Even though they may vary from person-to-person there are certain excuses that we all tend to make at one point or another.
Paying attention to the excuses you make by listening to your thinking and the language you use is very crucial to your personal success as this can teach you more about yourself than you’ve ever known. Not only will this help you identify your weak spots, but it will also help you identify the areas of your life that you should be giving more attention too. So; without further ado, let’s examine the many excuses we love to make.
- Excuse #1 – “I don’t know how…”
This excuse means that you lack belief and confidence in your own abilities. It also means that you haven’t taken the time to practice, learn or gain the experience or education necessary to know what to do.This excuse is very simple to deal with. All that you need to do is learn how to do what you need to do by reading books, enroll in a class, gain practical experience, ask for help and do other things that will give you the knowledge that you feel you lack.
- Excuse #2 – “I don’t have time…”
Is this true? If something is important enough, we always make time. What this excuse simply means is that you’re lacking the passion, focus, discipline and direction. Likewise, it suggests that your priorities are out of order and that you may be lacking the ability to manage your time effectively.Alternatively, this excuse could indicate that you simply don’t value your time or just don’t want to take the time to do what you feel you must do to achieve your desired outcomes. In fact, the causes for this excuse could very well be narrowed down to a lack of desire, which is rooted in some form of fear.
- Excuse #3 – “I don’t have enough money…”
All this excuse means is that you don’t consider your goal as valuable enough to invest in. It is simply not a priority to you. You believe that it is not worth the money you have to pay for it or it could mean that you are simply looking for an easier way to make it happen. Because of that, you don’t have the determination, desire and persistence to achieve your desired goal.This excuse also suggests that you could simply be lacking the strategies or ideas that could help you reach your objectives without necessarily needing to use the money.
- Excuse #4 – “I don’t have an education…”
This excuse simply means that you lack the required creativity, inspiration, and desire to do what needs to be done. In addition, it means that you lack the willingness to do the required work and go the extra mile by putting in a little more effort into achieving your goals – despite your lack of formal education.
There are many multi-millionaires and billionaires who have nothing more than a high school education and some don’t even have that. However, they did not allow that to prevent them from achieving their goals and objectives. They were creative, had the desire and were willing to put in the necessary work.
- Excuse #5 – “I’m too old/young…”
This one indicates a lack of understanding, confidence or perspective. Men and women of all ages have achieved great things. You are never too old or too young to attain your goals and objectives. It might require a little more effort, which means that you may need to be more persistent and creative. You need to open yourself up to different experiences and opportunities. Who knows; your age could work to your advantage. How do you see your glass? Half full or half empty? It all depends on your perspective and your ability to think flexibly about your circumstances.
- Excuse #6 – “It’s not the right time…”
I’ve heard this so many times!
Please indulge me the opportunity to ask again: When will it be the right time? How will you know when it’s the right time? When it’s the right time, what would have changed?
This excuse too means you lack perspective, information, and resources. Sometimes it could very well be not the right time to act. However, too often, this is just a flimsy excuse that indicates you lack perspective or simply that you don’t have the necessary resources to deal with the circumstances at hand. Your first objective should be to acquire the necessary resources you need to help you attain your desired outcome. Once your resources are in place, you may still need to gather more information about your challenge, which will help you to change your perspective. The moment these items are ticked off your list, you will soon find that the right time is always, right NOW!
- Excuse #7 – “I can’t change…”
How many times have you changed in life before? This one means you lack motivation and reason to change. It also suggests that you lack the emotional pain that would help you to accelerate change. Instead of saying: “I can’t change” – just say: “I don’t want to change”; because that would be more accurate.
When it comes to our motives and desires we are always pulled forward by the desire to experience pleasure or pushed forward by the desire to avoid pain. If you don’t believe you can change, the reason for this is that you simply haven’t associated enough pain to not changing. Once you begin to look at all the dire consequences that will result from not making a change, then you will soon realize that the motivation was always there. The question to ask yourself should be: What negative consequences could result from not making this change?
There are many other excuses and scenarios we could be explored here. A lack of inspiration is often due to many interrelated factors that at first may seem unrelated. However, the deeper we dig, the more patterns we will find, and the more patterns we find, the more likely we are to identify where your lack of inspiration to change your life stems from.
Anthony Robbins says fear is nothing more than “False Evidence Appearing Real”. It’s our perspective of fear that frightens us and prevents us from moving forward. However, once we gain knowledge and understanding about the thing we fear, then that is the moment we build enough confidence to move forward and gain the experience we need. Subsequently with enough experience under our belt, we develop even greater self-confidence that will propel us through our fears and towards the attainment of our goals and objectives. Click here for help to decisively deal with your fears.